


A Heart of Gold Filled With Fear

by heroes_never_die



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Abby Griffin Being an Asshole, Abby Griffin Is A Little Shit, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Dark, Everyone Needs A Hug, F/M, Finn Collins Being an Asshole, Finn Needs A Hug, Hurt Clarke Griffin, Octavia Blake & Clarke Griffin & Raven Reyes are Best Friends, POV Third Person Omniscient, Past Relationship(s), Romantic Fluff, Sex, Sexual Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2019-11-16
Packaged: 2020-07-26 02:43:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 12,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20036590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heroes_never_die/pseuds/heroes_never_die
Summary: Finn blames Clarke for his actions and nearly kills her if it weren't for Bellamy, she may have died. After killing Finn, Clarke nearly kills herself after getting incredibly depressed and guilty for her actions, but Bellamy isn't going to let anything happen to his princess. He can't lose her.





	1. The Dragon Against The Knight

**Author's Note:**

> So I'm a writer and am working on my own book {besides the fact that I'm 12}, but I needed a break from that so I wrote about Bellarke because I feed on drama and I hope you enjoy. P.S, Finn Collins is a SERIOUS ASSHOLE, but Bellamy isn't gonna let anything happen to his princess... UwU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Bellamy find Finn to be responsible for the death of eighteen innocent grounders. He doesn't take Clarke's reaction very well...

* * *

Clarke’s eyes were filled with horror. Finn had just shamelessly killed eighteen un-armed grounders. Men. Women. Children… The worst part was that he had done for her, because of her. And that just made her heart swell in guilt and pain. He finally saw her. His eyes, that were dry as bones, not a single tear strolling down his cheek, turned to face her. “I found you…” Clarke shook her head, her heart not willing to accept what her brain was seeing. “Finn…” As Finn inched closer and closer, Clarke could feel her heart beat faster and faster. Normally, she would pull Finn into a tight hug, happy to see him. But now, after what she had just witnessed him do… She knew that the Finn she had once loved was gone, and he had been replaced with an emotionless monster. All Clarke could muster out of her bloodied lips was, “Finn, what did you do?” Finn squinted his eyes, almost as if he didn’t know why she was upset. “I did it for you, Clarke. To find you…” Clarke was sure that he had lost his senses, he didn’t have a single drop of remorse in his cold, black heart. Once again, Finn took a step forward, which made Clarke’s body stiffen. She took a step back, towards Bellamy. Bellamy made her feel a small pinch of relaxation. She knew that he would protect her. As if they had telepathically communicated, Bellamy took a step in front of Clarke, shielding her from Finn. He could tell she was scared, and he would be damned if he was about to let Finn anywhere near her. Still, Finn inched closer and closer; his red fingers reaching for Clarke. “Stay away from me, Finn..” Clarke’s voice quivered with fear and disgust. Her beautiful blue eyes were shining. It took a moment for Bellamy to realize that they were shining with tears. Finn noticed Bellamy guarding Clarke, his arms stretched out; blocking him from her reach. “This is between me and Clarke, Blake. Stay out of it.” Bellamy scoffed, he couldn’t be serious. Clarke couldn’t keep her eyes off of Finn’s hands. They were covered in blood. She also had her eyes glued to an automatic rifle, that had also been colored red with the blood of innocent grounders. Innocent women, men, children. “Finn, back the fuck up.” Finn wouldn’t listen. He was so close that Bellamy could feel his warm breath echoing against his own dark face. A sudden shot rang through the air. Thankfully, it hadn’t been aimed at anyone. Bellamy shot a warning shot in the air, and Finn suddenly realized he was serious. Finn complied, backing up; his hazel eyes trained on Clarke. It was as if he wasn’t even blinking; which made Clarke’s heart standstill. The thing that came next, almost made it stop. “Clarke? What did I do wrong?" ____________________________________________________

"He's changed, Bellamy. He isn't the Finn we know. Not anymore..." Clarke's voice still shivered, and her hands were shaking with fear. Bellamy hated seeing her like this, the girl he loved... He was ready to pummel Finn into a tree for making Clarke blame herself for the deaths of eighteen grounders as if she hadn't had enough to worry about already. "I'm scared, Bel. This could absolutely destroy any chance of peace. If we weren't already at war with the grounders, we sure as hell are now." Bellamy sighed, knowing that Clarke was right. He hadn't even thought about the consequences of Finn's actions. All he had been focusing on was Clarke and keeping Finn away from her.

"Don't worry, Clarke. He won't be getting anywhere near you." Bellamy's voice had become serious and stained with worry. Clarke looked up at him and laced his fingers with hers. They were walking through the forest, back to Camp Jaha. They needed to figure out what to do with Finn, and how to stop the incoming war that was surely coming their way. Clarke and Bellamy both knew they couldn't fight the wrath of the Grounders. They would get revenge, no matter how many lives it took. Clarke and Bellamy were in the middle of a formed line the group had made in order to stay together. Finn was being guarded by Nathan Miller and a man that Bellamy recognized as a member of the guard on the Ark. They had tied Finn's hands together and grabbed his shoulders; pulling him along with them through the lush forest. 

Bellamy noticed Clarke glancing over her shoulder at Finn, who had been staring at Clarke the entire hike. It was as if he was going to drill a hole in her back with his gaze. It made her shiver. "I promise, Clarke. I won't let him _anywhere _near you." Clarke looked back to Bellamy, who had been staring at her. 

"Okay..." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I know this ain't that good. I might post another chapter if it gets a good repsknse. Thank for reading. Byeeeeeeeeeeee UwU


	2. "Just Dandy"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pretty much. something g bad happens to Clarke and we all know Bellamy ain't gonna let that stand, so enjoy, btw it's a lot of romantic fluff. UwU

The campfire caused Clarke's body to bathe in the orange glow that came from the pile of burning logs. Bellamy swore that she had never looked so beautiful. Clarke noticed him staring and blushed, her entire face turning red. Finn had also noticed. And he was enraged. He thought Clarke loved him. But now, she was just pretending like he didnt exist.

Instead, she was running around with fucking Bellamy Blake. Finn had always thought that Clarke hated Bellamy. Now he wasn't so sure. His train of thought was interrupted by Miller returning with another guard, Luke. They held three rabbits for the rather large group. Finn gave a disgusted look "Oh, would you rather the eighteen grounders your murdered, Spacewalker?" Miller spat at Finn, who sat back down as Miller as Luke handed out semi-cooked rabbit to everyone. Luke handed two servings to Clarke, who was still shaken up, and wasn't really in the mindset to eat.

"Thanks, Luke." Clarke bit into her serving of rabbit, pulling a stray leaf out of her mouth. Nonetheless, not complaining. Bellamy couldn't help but chuckle as Clarke looked at the leaf, a slightly disgusted expression on her face. Finn always knew she was good at making her emotions, but not around Bellamy. And that made him a little jealous. No actually, a lot. "Seriously, Bellamy?" Finn couldn't help but say his thoughts aloud. Finn scoffed and glared at Clarke, as I'd he was warning her what she was in for; before storming off. ____________________________________________________After everyone had finished eating their food, Clarke said goodnight to Octavia, Miller, Luke, and Bellamy before zipping herself up in her tent. It had only taken a second for her to collapse onto her sleeping bag. it was as hard as a rock, but Clarke didn't care. She was tired, but she knew there would be no sleep in her future. So she decided to get up and go for a walk. Might as well feel the warmth of the campfire before she faces the cold of her dreams. Or, nightmares... As she walked over, she saw Finn... But it was too late, he and already seen her.

"Hi, Clarke. Can't sleep?" Finn said in the creepiest voice possible. Once again, it made Clarke shake where she stood. "Thanks to you.. You are a monster, you do realize that, right?" As soon as the words left Clarke's mouth she knew she had gone too far.

"You bitch!" Finn charged at her, his hands reaching for her throat. She pinned her up against a nearby tree, assuring there would be bruises. She couldn't breathe, Finn was completely blocking off her airways. As she gasped and reached for air she couldn't get, Finn ripped her shirt off, violating her.

Next, he ripped his off, making Clarke's eye flood with tears. She couldn't call for help, she couldn't do anything. She felt useless. And she was. The only thing running through Clarke's mind was what he was going to do to her. She knew.. _He's going to rape me..._

Just as he was tearing off her jeans, Murphy and Miller came to the rescue, apparently having heard Clarke's sobs. They knew if they tried to fight him they would hurt her, more than he already did. But, they were too late. She had passed out. All the screaming awoke a sleeping giant. Bellamy. He came sprinting towards Finn, who has suddenly realized what he and done.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!" Bellamy's voice ran throughout the silent night. He landed punch after punch after punch until Finn was knocked out. Then he turned to Clarke. His princess. If she died now he wouldn't be able her how he felt. He wasn't going to let that happen.

He performed chest compressions, push after push, then mouth to mouth- which made Bellamy's heart flutter-. "C'mon Clarke, wake up! You're a fighter, so WAKE UP!" Now he was less doing CPR and just Hitting her chest, pleading if there was any God up there to bring this angel back. Just as he lost hope... Her eyes fluttered open, a brief gasp filling the air. Her voice was small, and quivered. "Bellamy?"

He looked up, tears blurring his vision. She pulled him into a tight hug, with no intention of letting go. He could feel his shirt getting a little wet, and she could feel his tears strolling down her bare back, stinging the open rounds in her back. She suddenly realized she was half-naked.

She quickly pulled away. Then turned to her right, her face filling with anguish. "Oh my God, is he-?" Clarke's eyes fell onto a sleeping Finn. "Passed out. Your boy Bellamy here went crazy." Miller replied. "Thank you, Bellamy. And you two, too." She said to her three heroes. "And they call me a cockroach." Murphy said with a smile, causing everyone to chuckle a bit; despite the horrifying situation that had just happened.

"I'm gonna go get, cleaned up." Clarke said as she rushed to pick her shirt up, and get to her tent. She didn't realize how injured she was. She also forgot that Octavia was in her tent. But, she could help stitch up Clarke's back. "Clarke? Oh my God, what the hell happened?" Octavia looked over Clarke, seeing all over her open wounds. "Finn tried to, um, rape me." Octavia's mouth went wide. Her surprise turned to anger. "Where the hell is he? Anyone who messes with my best friend messes with me." Clarke smiled, feeling a bit relaxed. "Actually, could you just help me stitch up my wounds. Bellamy already took care of Finn." Octavia nodded, grabbing the medical supplies from Clarke's pack.

As the needle went through Clarke's skin, she winced, almost yelling out in pain. She hadn't realized what discomfort she caused her patients. Then, Bellamy walked in, making Clarke ease up her back a bit. "Hey, Bel." Octsvia said to him, he replied with a quiet, "Hi, O." "Are you feeling alright, Clarke?" Clarke looked at him as if he were crazy. "Me? Oh, I'm doing just dandy, how was your day?" The sarcasm poured out of her mouth. Bellamy rolled his eyes, a small smile spreading across his face. "Finn is tied up, with metal wire this time, not rope. He'll be there all night. In my opinion, we should leave him here to the grounders." Clarke giggled.

He always loved her giggle, he looked forward to hearing it every day. But he had no idea how he could laugh after what just happened. "Have the scouts seen any grounder syet?" Clarke asked. Bellamy shook his head, and Octavia scoffed. "They'll be too busy mourning and burying their dead to focus on us, today at least." Octavia said with a cold expression. "Okay, I have guard duty over Finn, so see you in the morning, guys." Clarke smiled at him as he zipped up the thr tent'sentrance, with him outisde. Octavia burst out laughing as soon as he left.

"What?" Clarke said with a confused expression. "You so have a crush on him. It's so obvious, Clarke!" Clarke laughed, rubbing her head with her sweaty hands. "Maybe." Octavia pulled out one last stitch, as Clarke struggled to start still from laughter.

"Okay, all done you should survive." Octavia said jokingly. "Thanks, Octavia. Goodnight." Clarke laid on her sleeping back, which now seemed like the most comfortable thing in the world. "'Night, Clarke." And now, instead of having. nightmares about Finn, Clarke was currently dreaming of Bellamy, and his beautiful face, his hazel eyes, his dark curly hair. She loved all of it, and she loved him...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I am definetly doing another chapter after this since people seemed to not despise the last one. Remember to leave a kudos and comment, please. Bye! UwU


	3. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pretty short. It's pretty much the aftermath of Finn almost raping Clarke, Bellamy comforting her. Sorry, it's rly rushed and short. Enjoy!

Today was a new day. A clean slate. Clarke didn’t have to think about what happened last night, but she did have to face her rapist in the eyes. At first, it was hard to get up. Not because of the layer of scars that had been laid upon Clarke’s body, but because the lining of fear she felt. The fear she felt for Finn. And Octavia always knew how she felt. And Octavia told Bellamy everything.  
“Clarke? You in there?” Clarke, wake up.” Bellamy sighed and entered the tent, searching for Clarke. Clarke quickly slid into her sleeping bag, so that he didn’t see her awake. .She pretended that he had just woke her up. He didn’t want her to know she had been lying awake for hours, thinking of what had happened only a few hours ago.   
“Bellamy?” Bellamy crawled into the tent, kneeling next to Clarke.   
“Hey, Princess. Time to go.” Clarke nodded and pulled her self out of her sleeping bag. She quickly pulled the shirt that Finn tore off her, it had blood on it. She didn’t care.  
“Let’s go.” She struggled to get up, her injuries preventing her from sitting up. In a sudden moment, she fell back to her sleeping back; which only made her scars on her back erupt in even more pain.  
Bellamy sighed, giving his hand so Clarke could manage to get up. Wordlessly, she nodded to him and quickly walked out of the tent; which had been filled with speechless tension.   
Now she had to face everyone treating her like a piece of glass. Clarke hated being treated like she could break at any moment. But frankly, it was true. She was incredibly fragile after last night.  
“Clarke. Clarke, wait up!” Bellamy was concerned. She shouldn't be on her legs this quickly. Honestly, he would be happy to carry her back to Camp Jaha. “You shouldn’t be walking right now.”   
“Since when are you the doctor, Bellamy?” Clarke scoffed. Bellamy knew she was masking her feelings. Pretending she was fine. He knew better than to fall for that.  
He grabbed her by her hand, stopping her from continuing to limp on. “You don’t need to hide your feelings with me. You know that, right?” Clarke looked left to right making sure no one was looking, no one was listening. Then she let her shield down, unwielded her armor.  
“Sorry, Bel. It’s just… I can’t stop thinking of him, of what he would’ve done. But I’m okay, I promise.” No, I’m not… Bellamy gave her one last look before grasping her hand, helping her to move. She hated that Finn was making her feel this way. He would deal with Finn later, right now, they just needed to get Clarke home without anymore PTSD.   
{Later}

Raven came rushing to Clarke and Octavia, the three of them hugging each other tightly. “Clarke! You’re alive!” Raven hadn’t been here when Clarke had first returned to camp. At that time, she had been out with a group looking for various Ark ships that hadn’t landed near the main ship.  
“Yeah, I’m alive. It’s so good to see you, Raven.” The four of the beamed with happiness. Raven suddenly realized she had been relying on Octavia and Bellamy’s arms on the way home.   
“Oh my god, what the hell did the grounders do to you?” Clarke sighed. She hated that she would have to go over the story over and over again, relive it over and over again.   
Octavia left Clarke to Bellamy as she whispered something in Raven’s ear. Clarke could tell what Octavia said by the look on Raven’s face. Her usual bubbly expression had turned serious, and filled with confusion. She turned to Clarke.  
“Finn did that?” Clarke nodded. “No. He wouldn’t do that. Not the Finn I know?”   
“The Finn you knew,” Bellamy corrected. “He’s changed. It’s like he’s been possed by a whole other person.”   
“That’s not what I’m worried about.” Clarke squinted at her, perplexed. “He committed a war crime. I don’t think the council will be very forgiving.” Octavia hadn’t even thought of that yet.  
“The grounders won’t be either.” Clarke turned to see her mother, standing next to Bellamy. Clarke dug her nails into her skin, causing them to bleed. She hated her mother. Abby had so carelessly gotten her father executed, and didn’t even share a tear of shame. Clarke hated her mother…  
“Are you okay, honey?” Abby reached out to touch Clarke on the cheek, but Clarke pulled away; nearly falling over.   
“Don’t touch me!” Abby nodded, her lips quivering, tears welling up in her eyes as she retreated to med-bay.   
An awkward silence fell over the group. “I should go check on the horses,” Octavia said, nearly whispering.   
“I need to go finish some assignments. See you later, Clarke.” Raven replied as she walked to her cabin, leaving Clarke and Bellamy alone. Bellamy looked to Clarke, who was rubbing her eyes. He knew she was exhausted.  
“You didn’t sleep last night, did you?” Clarke sighed. Bellamy knew her better than anyone else. And he could tell when she was hiding what she was feeling.   
“No… I couldn’t. Every time I close my eyes, I just see me. I saw him standing over my body, I see him killing me. If you didn’t save me, I would’ ve-”   
“I did save you. You’re okay, and that’s what matters. He will never go near you again. That’s a promise, princess.” Bellamy drew and ‘x’ over his heart. “Now, you can try and get some sleep for me?” Clarke nodded, not taking her eyes off of him. She silently drew and ‘x’ on her heart, which was beating faster and faster with every glance that Bellamy gifted Clarke with. She had to tell him how she felt soon. But this wasn’t the right moment. Now when they were talking about her being raped. That didn’t mean she couldn’t kiss him on the cheek. As she pulled away from the warmth of his freckled cheek, she blushed and quickly turned away, holding her breath the entire way to the entrance to her tent.  
“Goodnight, Bellamy.” Bellamy watched as the girl of his dreams walked to her, Raven’s, and Octavia’s tent. He was breathless, caught off guard by Clarke’s actions. Clarke quickly rushed into her tent and grabbed the radio.  
“Raven, Octavia. Get your asses in here now.” Clarke held her breath as Raven and Octavia nervously walked into the tent, slightly scared.  
“What is it Clarke, I was working on something important?” Clarke just blurted it out.  
“I KISSED BELLAMY ON THE CHEEK!” Raven and Octavia’s mouth gaped open. She could tell what they were thinking.  
“You KISSED BELLAMY?”   
“On the cheek?” Clarke replied quietly. Raven and Octavia burst in a pile of giggles. Tears streamed down their faces from the number of laughs that were escaping their lips.   
“About TIME!” Raven shouted. And they got right to gossip for the rest of the night, giggles and friends distracting Clarke from the nightmares she would have once she fell asleep. For the first time since Wells died, she was truly happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I know this was incredibly short, I just have a lot going on right now and didn't have a lot of time. Sorry :( Hope you liked this chapter if you did please leave a kudos and a comment! <3


	4. Do You Understand?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke has been locked in her bed for three weeks... three weeks since she had seen Finn. Three weeks since she was raped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I'm sorry I know this is like months since the last chapter but please leave kudos and a comment! <3 XXX

“No! No, stop!” Clarke yelled, her screams infecting the freezing air like a virus, spreading through the entire camp.   
“Clarke. Clarke, O!” Octavia shook Clarke awake, violently tearing her from her nightmares. Finn’s face had been infringed into Clarke’s brain as she felt the tree against her back, felt the injuries tear her bones like bread, and Finn, tearing her shirt off like it was air.   
“Octavia?” Clarke breathed, her chest rising up and down as if a tornado was erupting in her body. “Octavia…”   
Clarke rubbed her eyes, sleep slowly invading her body. “Let me get Bellamy.”   
Clarke sighed, reaching after Octavia. “Please. Please don’t do that.” Nearly five minutes after, Clarke was rolled up in her bed as a gentle knock rattled her heart. “Finn?” Clarke retreated into her sheets, preparing for the boy to pounce on her.   
“Hey, hey. It’s just me, okay? It’s just me.” Bellamy sat on the bed beside her, gently taking her hand. She looked like she hadn’t eaten or drank anything in days. Her head was painted with a gleaming layer of sweat, her eyes met with pale bags. “You haven’t been eating, have you?”   
Clarke rubbed her face, rising a bit out of the bed to reveal her sports bra and nothing else. Bellamy didn’t care. His best friend was raped, he wasn’t going to think about himself right now. She needed to know she’d be okay. “I can’t, Bel. My stomach won’t let me.”   
Clarke stared into a random corner of the room, looking at thin air… at least it was to him. “He won’t let me.” She whispered.   
Bellamy sighed, turning around to see nothing there. “Clarke, there’s nothing there.” Bellamy gently placed his finger on Clarke’s cheek, turning her eyes to him.   
“He has no control of you. He will never touch you again. I won’t let anything happen to me. Do you understand?” Bellamy asked as Clarke nodded, beginning to turn her head towards the corner. “Clarke. Do you understand.”   
“Yes. I know, Bel.” Clarke replied hugging him, nearly choking him. Slowly he stood up, heading over to her drawers. He pulled out a sweatshirt and leggings, along with socks Harper had made for her as a ‘Get Well’ gift.   
Clarke had been lying in bed for two weeks… the camp was in havoc. “Get dressed.” Clarke looked at him, surprised. Everyone had been so nice, just let her hide her feelings like usual. “Get dressed. We’re going to get breakfast. You need to go outside.” Bellamy placed down the clothes on her bed, looking her in the eye.   
“Bel…” Clarke sighed, pulling her hair into a ponytail. Bellamy looked at Clarke sighing.   
“If you want me to just stand here and watch you kill yourself, that’s not going to happen. Now, you are going to get dressed and get out of bed. Okay?” Clarke sighed, before nodding, slipping the sweatshirt over her head, and stepping out of the bed.   
“Okay.” Bellamy smiled, almost surprised it worked and walked out of the room with Clarke holding onto his arm like it was the last life-preserver on the sinking boat.   
In the cafeteria, Raven and Monty ate at a table, which was completely empty beside them. “Clarke?” Raven asked Monty as Clarke came over in her slippers, and a sweatshirt that read aloud ‘Brooklyn’. Apparently it was some city before the bombs. Abby had actually said they were near there now.   
“Hey, Clarke.” Monty smiled, taking a small sip of water from a pouch. Clarke smiled at Monty as she brushed her hair back, taking a tray of cereal from the table.   
“Hey Monty, hey Raven.” Bellamy smiled as Clarke erupted into a conversation, along with Monty and Raven. She was acting normal. She wasn’t masking her emotions. She’d finally gotten over it. For the first time in forever, she was happy.


	5. Spacewalker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn faces the repercussions of raping Clarke and murdering dozens of Grounders. I can't say I feel bad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, thanks for reading! Leave a kudos and a comment pls!

“What’s going on?” Clarke asked, her voice rising in panic. There had been a commotion since two Grounders showed up at Camp Jaha.   
“They’ve been there since the morning.” Bellamy failed to disclose the fact they asked for Finn’s life. Monty eyed Bellamy, knowing he wouldn’t tell her.  
“They want Finn.” Clarke’s eyes widened, slightly eyeing Bellamy before walking over to the Riders, who were shut off by the large, sturdy gate. “Or they kill us all.”   
Clarke hated Finn. She knew if he died he would haunt her forever. Her dreams, her nightmares. She also knew she wouldn’t let her people die for the life of one… one she loved. “You know what we have to do, Bellamy.”   
Bellamy sighed, pushing his hair back. “We don’t know anything yet, Clarke.” Clarke sighed.   
“They won’t wait much longer. We have to get him out of here.” Clarke looked towards Bellamy, desperate.   
Bellamy sighed, tossing orders around. “Okay, Monty, stay here, keep everyone calm… Clarke, let’s go.” Bellamy led Clarke towards where Finn was being kept, where Raven was. “Are you sure you want to do this?”   
“He’s one of our people. We have to. It doesn’t matter what I want…” Clarke led on, not even flinching when she laid her eyes on Finn. “Get up, Finn.” Clarke grabbed Finn by his jacket and pushed him into the woods, keeping her palm on her pistol.   
“Okay, you two get everyone else, I’ll get Finn to the dropship.” Clarke ordered. As Bellamy began to argue, Clarke glared at him; continuing into the woods.   
After nearly ten minutes walking in the woods in utter silence and Finn glancing at Clarke, Finn spoke up. “Clarke, I’m sorry.” Clarke laughed to herself, the grip on her gun tightening.   
“Save it for someone who’s willing to listen, Finn. I don’t need to hear your shitty apology for raping me.” Clarke spat at him, as Finn began to counteract the argument; a twig snapped in the distance.   
“Clarke-”   
“Shut up.” Finn saw her expression as he shut his mouth, realizing what was going on.   
“Someone’s following us.” Clarke whispered, her face much more serious now. Out of nowhere, a Grounder swung at Clarke’s head, pushing her against the ground, unconscious.  
“CLARKE!” Finn screamed as she lay there, possible dead. Before he could even react, he grabbed Clarke’s pistol, pointing it at the Grounder’s head. “GO! Get out of here!” He screamed, as the Grounder ran, disappearing from sight.  
“Clarke?”   
___________________________________

“What the hell did you do?!” Bellamy screamed in Finn’s face as he took Clarke from Finn instantly. Bellamy carefully placed her on the metallic floor of the dropship, panic coursing through his veins like cold blood.   
“Clarke?” Octavia glared at Finn, pushing him against the wall. “You’re lucky I don’t slaughter you where you stand, murderer.”   
“We got attacked, it wasn’t me. The Grounder hit her on the head.” Bellamy inspected Clarke’s head. She had some blood and bruising, but she would survive. “Get me a rag, and water. NOW!”   
(time skip)  
“Okay, Clarke. C’mon, wake up.” He slightly shook her, as she gasped for air. Her chest rapidly rose and sunk as her eyes locked on Bellamy.   
“Bellamy?” Clarke breathed as his eyes wrapped around her. “Bel, what… what happened?” Bellamy could feel tears emerging from his eyes. He never thought he would love someone other than his sister… but he did.  
“You’re safe, Clarke.You’re gonna be fine, you just need to rest.” Bellamy whispered in her ear. Finn stared at him from the other side of the room, his hands playing with a knife; daggers in his eyes.   
“BELLAMY! WE GOT COMPANY!” Raven screamed from outside the dropship.   
“Shit.” Bellamy glanced at Finn as he grabbed his gun, running outside. Clarke began to get up as Finn ran over to help her.   
“Get off me, Finn. It’s your fault we’re trading bullets with the Grounders.” Clarke spat as she grabbed her pistol from him, following after Bellamy.   
Clarke froze as Octavia stood in front of Bellamy. “Grounders?”, she asked Bellamy running towards her.   
“They just showed up…” Bellamy exchanged confused glances with Bellamy as an arrow shot right by her face, causing her hair to move with the momentum.   
“Get down!” Bellamy yelled as he pulled Clarke next to him, a piece of debris covering them.   
“T-thanks.” Suddenly a branch cracked in front of them, as a familiar head emerged from the trees. “Someone’s coming…”   
“Finn?” Raven gasped, removing the scope from her face. Finn turned towards the group, his face apologizing one last time before a pair of Grounders snatched them, pushing them into the woods.   
“Finn!” Raven screamed as the Grounders ran out of sight, Finn in their hands.


	6. Remember Me.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn dies, yayyyyyyyy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally have spent two hours studying Finn's death and it was depressing, so leave a kudos and a comment to make it worth it

“They took him… we have to go get him!” Raven yelled to the others, as they stared at each other; still in cover.   
“Raven, get down!” Clarke tackled Raven as an arrow sliced a strand of Clarke’s golden hair off. Raven laid horrified as Clarke sighed, making eye contact with Raven; still on top of her. “We can’t help him if we’re dead. Stay down.”   
Raven nodded as Clarke cautiously crawled to Bellamy. “What do we do?” Bellamy asked her.   
“We protect our people.” Bellamy nodded, taking Clarke’s shaking hand. He finished her sentence.   
“No one left behind.”   
(time skip) 

“We have to do something.” Raven whispered, watching the Grounders tie Finn to a wooden staff to be tortured and executed. “Clarke. They think you’re our leader. You can talk to them.”   
Raven’s eyes begged for help, at the minimum some sort of mercy, comfort. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to do anything, Raven, but I’ll try.”   
Raven hugged her, before carefully slipping a small dagger in her sleeve. “Kill the bitch.” Raven ordered, as Bellamy exchanged glances with Clarke.   
“Clarke.” Bellamy pulled Clarke aside as she walked to the camp’s gates. “They’ll kill you if you kill her.”   
“They’ll kill him. Raven will never recover if they kill him. I need to try.” Bellamy pulled her into a hug, as tears welled in his eyes.   
“Promise me you’ll come back.” She pushed him away, making eye contact with him.   
“I promise.” Once again, she kissed his cheek before pacing towards the Grounder tents. She emerged into the camp, passing the dozens of Grounder soldiers.   
“I’m here to see your Commander. Let me pass.” Clarke explained as a dark red blotch grew on Clarke’s shirt, her body aching forward due to the spear.   
“Teik Klark pass” Lexa called from feet away. The entirety of Camp Jaha watched in a moment of quiet horror as Clarke approached Lexa. “You bleed for nothing. You cannot stop this.” Lexa uttered to Clarke, as she shook her head.   
“No. Only you can.” Clarke pleaded, her face in a curved fit of desperation as Grounders began to chant foriegn languages behind the two. Finn had arrived. “Show my people how powerful you are. Show them you can be merciful. Show them you aren’t a savage.”   
“We are what we are.” Lexa snided as she began to walk away. Clarke stepped forward carefully, wary of the Grounder soldiers.   
“Then I’m a killer. I burned three-hundred of your people.” Clarke cried, desperate for any ray of gleaming hope. “I slit a man’s throat and watched him die. I’m soaked… in Grounder blood.” Clarke gritted her teeth, glancing towards Finn’s helpless body. “Take me.”   
Tears spilled down Finn’s baggy eyes as he looked towards Raven, Monty, Octavia, Bellamy… Clarke. All the faces that would be sucked from his brain as he entered an infinite black voice of death. For the first time in his life, he was truly horrified.   
Lexa was shocked Clarke would give her life for Finn’s. Lexa soon found out what’d happened from Finn. Perhaps Clarke was just that good. “Finn is guilty.”   
“No. He did it for me. He did it for me.” Clarke’s voice broke as she realized how guilty she was. How much blood had stained her hands. No matter what she did it would never wash off.   
“Then he dies for you.” Clarke’s face pained in an unimaginable way. There was no way she could change Lexa’s mind. Finn would die here and it would be her fault. No matter what she did someone always died.   
“C’mon, Clarke. Do it.” Bellamy’s face sunk as she realized there were two options to this situation. Option one. Clarke would slit Lexa’s throat, marking her fate. Or, she allowed Finn to be killed, causing Raven to wallow in his pleas for help as the love of her life slowly died before her.   
“Can I say goodbye?” Clarke begged, as Finn trembled against the binds that held him to his death. Lexa nodded, as Clarke quickly trudged towards Finn; tears spilling down her bloodied face.   
“What is she doing?” Raven snarled, her face scrunching up in confusion. Bellamy began to precipitate Option two would carry out.   
“Finn.” Clarke hesitated for a split second before wrapping her arms around the frightened boy, who’s tears fell onto her jacket. “You’re okay, you’re going to be okay.”   
“I’m scared.” Finn admitted, as a gut-wrenching squish subtly carried out through the night. Clarke’s sleeve was vacant. Clarke’s silent sobs carried out as Finn whispered one last… “Thanks, princess.”   
Clarke emerged from Finn’s bloody body as the Grounders began to retaliate. “Em ste odon.” She ordered, stopping the soldiers in their tracks.   
Clarke passed her in silent torture as she began to return to Camp Jaha, her arms shaking; her body damp with Finn’s and her own tears. Raven suddenly realized what had happened as Bellamy caught her in his arms. “NO! NO! NOOOO!”   
Raven’s wails continued as the night carried on with a stench of blood and tragedy, a small light in the world distinguished… a Spacewalker gone. 

____________________________________

Clarke’s breath shuddered as she struggled to wipe off the blood that remained on her hands, a constant reminder of what she had done. She slowly broke down, silent cries echoing through the vacant room as Abby and Kane barged in. “They would’ve tortured him, I had to.” Clarke sobbed in her mother’s chest and Kane stood, astonished.   
“It’s okay… it’s okay.” Abby reassured her daughter as the air was filled with the silent stench of salty tears, tapping on the muck floor.   
“What did I do? What did I do?” Clarke panicked as Abby squeezed her even tighter.   
A sudden tap of footsteps ricocheted across the walls. “The commander is ready to talk.” A grounder snarled as Lexa passed her, her eyes admitting her every thought.   
“Blood has answered blood.” Lexa began, her face expressionless. “Some on my side say that’s not enough. They wanted the murderer to suffer as our tradition demands. But, they do not know that your suffering will be worse.”   
Clarke winced as she realized the cold fact. She would never forget Finn, whether that was good or bad. “What you did tonight will haunt you until the end of your days.” Clarke hung her head.   
“Still, there will be restitution.” Lexa glanced at the vacant pole that Finn had died upon. “The body will be given to the people of Tondc. Murderer and murdered joined by fire.”   
Abby died inside, knowing Clarke would never rest for the next couple of weeks if not months. “Only then can we have peace.”   
Kane cut in, seeing the silent torture Clarke and Raven would be partaking in if they didn’t get to say goodbye. “No. No, we’ve done enough. The boy should be buried by his own people.” Kane argued, his face pleaded for mercy.   
“Enough?” Indra snided. “We were owed the pain of eighteen deaths. We were owed… our righteous kill.” Indra continued on, her black heart snuffing out the chances of redemption. “My village deserves justice.” Indra spat.   
“You don’t want justice. You want vengeance.” Abby corrected her as Indra gritted her teeth.   
“You have not seen my vengeance.” Indra threatened as Clarke stepped forward, quieting the room.   
“We’ll do it.” She overstood, her dead eyes reflecting across the stained dirt. “But when it’s over, we talk about how to get our people out of Mount Weather. All of our people.” Clarke propositioned.   
“We want the same things, Clarke.” Clarke nodded, blinking away the tears.   
“Good, when do we leave?” Clarke asked, her voice full of agony. Lexa furrowed her eyebrows.   
“Now. Choose your attendants.” Faces flashed through Clarke’s brain. All of the people who never got the chance to say goodbye to Finn. Yet she did. Raven deserved to say goodbye to Finn. Monty deserved the chance to say goodbye to Finn. Anyone but her.   
“Clarke. You don’t have to do this.” Abby silently begged. Raven was like a second daughter to Abby, and knew how hurt she would be.   
“Yes I do. If this truce doesn’t hold, I killed Finn for nothing.” Clarke replied, her face dead as she walked out.   
“Clarke’s right. We need to do this. Peace with the Grounder’s is the on;y way we’ll survive.” Kane explained, as Abby held him back.   
“No, I don’t think they know what peace is.” She spat like a viper as Kane swallowed silently.   
“The Commander does.” Abby gawked, glancing as Lexa returned to her group.   
“She’s a child! They’re being led by a child.” Abby resided. Kane sat in an instant of self-realization.   
“So are we.” He replied emotionless before exiting the room.   
__________________________________

“Go away.” Raven’s nasally voice spat poison at Clarke as she approached FInn’s body, which was only comforted by one person.   
“Raven, I’m sorry.” Clarke hung her head, knowing that wasn’t good enough.   
“I SAID ‘GO AWAY’!” Raven hollered at the top of her lungs as her eyes produced what seemed like an endless amount of tears.   
“I know how hard this must be for you… but, I’m leaving with the Grounders and I need you to keep working on the radio.” Clarke struggled to pretend like nothing at all had happened as Raven gawked in mis-belief.   
“What are you doing, what are you doing?!” Raven screeched as three Grounders carried Finn’s body away.   
“They need to take him!” Clarke grabbed Raven’s arms as she fought against the Grounders, who hurriedly rushed away with the body.  
“Like hell they do!” Raven screamed as she watched the boy she loved being carried away “You agreed to this?” She whispered,   
“They’re taking him back… to where the massacre took place.” Clarke pleaded for Raven to behave. God only knows what would happen if she upset the Grounder’s too much. “There’s a death ritual… it’s the only way to get our people out of Mount Weather.” Clarke begged as Raven sobbed.   
“Then I’m coming too. And don’t worry, I’ll bring your damn radio.” She spat before walking off towards her room… their room. Finn and Raven’s room. Formerly.


	7. Poison

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and the grounders are throwing daggers at each other while the circumstances in mount weather worsen.

“Hey. You doing alright?” Bellamy asked, his hand gripping hers firmly. Clarke nodded, cleary masking her emotions. Again. “You did the right thing.” Bellamy reassured her.   
“Yeah, now I get to live with it.” Bellamy cautiously looked at the Grounders surrounding the pair.   
“You still think this truce is a bad idea, don’t you?” Clarke asked, her voice shivering, as if there was a cold inhabiting her body like an infection.   
“I think we’re wasting time with politics while our friends are in trouble.” Bellamy admitted, the gravel under his feet louder than him.   
“We need their army to get in, you know that, Bellamy.” Bellamy rolled his eyes.   
“I’m just not thrilled we’re working with the people who’ve killed dozens of us.” Clarke made eye contact with him.   
“We haven't been so nice either.” Clarke clearly hadn’t slept the previous night. She was trying to keep the conversation going so she didn’t have to talk about Finn.   
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Bellamy’s words were muffled constants to Clarke. She was focused on Finn. Not his body, which Raven was clinging to; silently fuming at Lexa. She was focused on the Finn staring at her through the trees, silently stalking her; making sure she felt remorse and guilt for her actions. “Clarke.”   
Bellamy broke Clarke out of her spell as she looked at him, playing it off like nothing had happened. “Clarke, I’m not going to let you mask your emotions… again.” Bellamy stopped her, looking her dead in the eyes. “I’m not going to let you get lost in the white noise. You’re going to survive this.”   
“Bel, it’s not like I can just wake up and Finn will be there, talking to Raven or helping you catch food for us. I killed him. And sure, it was for the good of my people, but people got hurt because of me. I have to own that. I can’t just brush it off like fairy-dust.” Clarke walked faster, avoiding Bellamy; tears beginning to well in her eyes.   
As Finn followed Clarke, his cold, dead breath on her neck, Raven sobbed on Finn’s chest, smearing his blood on her face. “Nou get yu daun, gustus. Like yu've jus told me. Hukop laik risky.” Lexa droned on as the collops of her horse echoed across the Earth.   
______________________________

It was nighttime. They had set camp a couple miles off of Tondc. “Clarke, it’s safer on our side.” Bellamy advised as Clarke stood up to look at Kane and Abby glaring at the Grounders behind Bellamy.   
“We need to trust them, Bellamy. And they need to know we trust them.” Bellamy glared at the Grounders surrounding Clarke, as they peered at her, whispering foriegn plans.   
Nonetheless, Bellamy laid his sleeping-bag less than a foot away from hers, as they settled down to sleep. Bellamy would never let Clarke get hurt again. She was eighteen, and had already witnessed more horror than most of the Arkers combined.   
“Natrona.” Indra muttered under her breath as Lincoln passed her, venom in her eyes. Lincoln ignored her, and laid down next to Octavia.   
“Natrona?” Octavia asked him, eyeing Indra and her group cautiously. Lincoln sighed, a passion, flame in his heart nearly dim.   
“Traitor… my people fear me.” Lincoln’s voice nearly broke. He was no longer a Reaper, but the Grounders didn’t believe in science… they believed in the Flame, and the power of the Reapers. “They think the Reaper is still inside me. They treat me like I could strike at any moment.”   
“You can talk to me, Lincoln.” Octavia told him, lining his tattoos with her finger as she sat beside him; peering at the stars. “About what happened. At Mount Weather.” She tried, carefully not to trigger him. Lincoln sighed, his eyes shut, hearing the beep of the machines.  
“I can’t.” He hesitated, not taking his eyes off of the constellations. Octavia scrunched her face up, confused. ]  
“You’re not a monster.” This time, Lincoln looked at Octavia, his heart swelling with fear… not for him, for her.   
“I hope you’re right.” He muttered as Octavia kissed him gently, slowly emerging into something more.   
A cold breed spread through Clarke as she opened her eyes, gasping quietly. She silently turned over, attempting to stand up to get air; only to see Finn, staring at her with blood painted on his face, a raging expression drawn through his eyes. Without hesitation Clarke, jumped back, accidentally waking Bellamy. “Clarke?” He muttered turning over and seeing the frightened expression on her face.   
“Clarke, what’s wrong?” He asked quietly, reaching for her hand. Without warning, Clarke fell into his stomach, just quietly crying. Nothing else. “Clarke…”   
“I’m so sorry, Bellamy…” She silently cried into his shirt as he squinted his eyes.   
“Sorry for what, princess?” He asked softly, his grave voice echoing in her ears.   
“Everything…” After nearly ten minutes of just sitting there, in his arms crying, she slowly fell asleep in his arms. He stayed completely still for the rest of the night, careful not to wake her, as he kept her safe.   
_____________________________________________

“Klark kom skai kru. You shall do the honor.” Lexa ordered as she passed the torch to Clarke, figuratively and literally. She passed down the legacy of the coalition, and the legacy of Costia, of Lexa’s love.   
Bellamy nodded towards Bellamy as Raven watched in slow agony. Clarke was a murderer in her eyes, a murderer who took her boyfriend away from her. Sure, Finn was a rapist and a murderer as well… but that wasn’t the Finn Raven knew.   
Something snapped in Finn when he landed on the ground. Some sort of safety protocol, but for his body. Something that would spread like a virus across the land, defacing it. “Yu gonplei ste odon.” She recited, as flames slowly spread across the covered body like an infection.   
The smell of broiled blood snuck into the air as the Grounders and Arkadians stood together. “It is done.” Lexa called after the body was charred beyond recognition. “We shall feast to show the strength of our newly bounded truce.” Lexa called as her people followed her to the dining hall, well really a long-forgotten subway station.   
“I’m sorry.” Clarke repeated as everyone else fell away from the burning body, everyone except Abby Griffin.   
“This isn’t your fault, Clarke. You can’t blame yourself. You have to let us help you get through this.” Clarke glanced idly at her mother as she continued without a breath. “I went through the same thing with, and you helped me.”   
Clarke squinted her eyes in anger. “You mean with Dad?!” Clarke gawked, not believing what she was hearing. “What I did was nothing like what you did with Dad! You could’ve given him a chance! I had no choice.” Clarke stormed off before Abby could reply.   
Red filled her face as she bumped into a sturdy figure. “Skai raunon.” The figure growled. Clarke studied the man face, instantly realizing he was one of them Grounders who was there… at the massacre.   
“Oh, urm… hi.” Clarke shook herself, regaining her confidence. “I’m trying to get to the feast, excuse me.” Clarke scooted past him, aware of his breath on her neck; threatening her.   
Suddenly, a ray of light bled through the terrifying situation. Bellamy. Before she could run to him, she felt a small prick in her neck. Clarke played it off, thinking it was some insect. “Bellamy.” Clarke breathed, relief flowing through her blood.   
“Hey princess, you okay?” He asked, eyeing the Grounder, who was eyeing them. Bellamy noticed a small injection on Clarke’s neck. “Hey, Clarke. What is this?”   
The world seemed to spin around Clarke in a dizzy haze. “Princess? Clarke. Clarke!” Bellamy yelled as he caught her in his arms, her vision blurring.   
“Bel…” Clarke slurred before her vision faded to black, as Bellamy brushed her hair back, trying to keep her awake.   
“Clarke… Clarke!” His voice murmured through her ears as she fell unconscious, her hair falling onto the mucky ground.   
_____________________________________________

“Clarke… Clarke!” Finn’s voice screamed at her. Clarke shook awake, seeing his face. “Clarke.”   
“Finn?” Clarke nearly whispered, her pale face wrinkled in confusion. “I’m still dreaming.” Dreaming wasn’t the right word. The right word was nightmare. “You’re gone.” She recited. Finn frowned, his face full of blood.   
“Don’t you love me?” His voice distorted as his face began to decompose, turning green and disgusting.   
“Love is weakness.” She replied blankly as he began to fade into dust, her vision turning white.   
“Clarke. Clarke!” Bellamy’s muffled voice began to clear as her vision showed his curly black hair, tan skin, and freckled face. “Clarke.” Bellamy smiled, relieved.   
“Bellamy?” Her slurred words were music to his ears. Bellamy grinned, holding Clarke’s clammy hands. “What h-happened?” She stuttered, trying to pick up her head; but immediately falling down due to pain.   
“Careful, okay? You were poisoned by a Grounder. Take it easy.” Clarke’s face scrunched up as Abby appeared behind Bellamy, her expression extremely angry.   
“Could you give us a moment, Bellamy?” Bellamy sighed, seeing the furious expression on Clarke’s face, before exiting the room.   
“Clarke. I told you we couldn’t trust these people.” Abby whined, as Clarke rolled her eyes.   
“Mom, don’t tell me ‘We have to break the truce’.” Abby sighed, annoyed by Clarke’s antics. “They have an army, you do realize that, right? They could wipe us out without a second thought.”


	8. Please Stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke figures out that Bellamy is leaving for Mount Weather... sorry I'm not good at summaries.

“Feeling better, princess?” Clarke sighed, rubbing her clammy face. Bellamy looked to Clarke, a hopeful face on painted across his eyes dying as she coughed blood into a musty handkerchief.   
“I need to see Lexa.” Clarke pulled herself out of the dreary bed, which was soaked with her sweat and tears.   
“Woah, woah. Clarke, you need to rest.” Clarke pushed herself even further, limping towards the exit of the door.   
“I’ve been resting for a week, and while I’ve been sleeping all nice, who knows how many of our friends have been killed in Mount Weather. I need to get them out of there, or all of their blood is on my hands.” Clarke walked out of the camp, her body aching.   
“Clarke, wait!” Bellamy caught up with her, his eyes serious, as if they were forbidding some secret to come out. “I’m going to Mount Weather, with Lincoln. We need an inside man.”   
Clarke could feel herself shivering, not because of the winding cold, because she knew there was no stopping Bellamy, especially when it came to protecting his friends. “Bellamy…”   
“Clarke I need to do this, like you said, if our friends are dying, their blood is on my hands.”   
“Bellamy, we… I need you. I can’t lose you too.” Bellamy smiled, trying to make light of the harbering situation.   
“Who said you’re going to lose me, princess?” Bellamy smirked as he and Clarke walked into Lexa’s tent, disrupting a meeting between her and Indra.   
“Yu kom em kom do disha?” Clarke had picked up small fractures of tridasleng since Finn’s death ceremony, it was important to know the enemy… ally’s language.   
Bellamy, however, had no idea what Clarke was saying. “Osir shall telk, Indra.” Lexa ordered as Indra nodded, leaving the room before glancing at Bellamy angrily. “Bellamy, leave us.”   
Bellamy nodded, exchanging a worried glance with Clarke as Lexa stared at her. Desire was the theme. “Clarke. Bellamy decided himself to go to the enemy’s territory. I had no part in this.” Lexa exchanged a last glance with Clarke as she groaned, her mouth biting back tears. “You won’t change his mind. He wishes to protect his people, you must let him do that, Clarke. You would do the same, as would I. Your heart is strong, but this boy is holding you back. You must forget him.”   
Clarke squinted at Lexa as she approached, her warm breath rippling across Clarke’s pale skin. “Lexa, wh-”   
Lexa pressed her lips against Clarke’s with no warning, nearly giving her a heart attack as she instantly pulled away, a shocked expression painted across her face. “What the hell?” Clarke wiped her face as Lexa returned to her throne, clearly hurt.   
“You love Bellamy… don’t you.” Clarke had been caught so off guard, she stuttered an answer.   
“Y-yes, he’s my friend.” Lexa rolled her eyes. Clarke knew what they were discussing, and Lexa yearned to hear the answer.   
“Do you love him, Clarke?” Lexa’s eyes threatened Clarke as she nodded, her breath hitching between exhale.   
“Yes…” Lexa sighed, pushing her stray strands of hair back as she stretched her shoulders, deflecting the bullet that had just been shot through her heavy heart.   
“Beja bants.” Clarke hesitated, her feet stuck to the ground, as if chains had been latched around her ankles, preventing her from exiting the large tent. “Nau!” Lexa yelled in Clarke’s face as Clarke scrambled out, running towards her tent, passing Bellamy, who was listening through the thin flaps of the tent.   
“Clarke! Clarke, what’s wrong?” Clarke had tears appearing in her eyes. What did she just do? Did she hurt the alliance?... would all the people who died be remembered in vain…”Clarke, what happened?”   
Bellamy had nearly forgotten Clarke’s words to Lexa… “Yes…” Clarke looked up at Bellamy, as he saw the black face-paint smeared on her pink cheeks. “S-she kissed me…” Clarke breathed, her eyes directed towards the floor in a state of confusion.   
“What?” Bellamy gawked, his blood slowly boiling as he got up to have a word with Lexa.   
“W-wait, Bellamy!” Bellamy gave Clarke one last glance as she grabbed his hands, pulling him towards her in a quick kiss, her lips burning bright red. “Please stay…” Clarke’s head rested on Bellamy’s shoulders as he joined her in her bed, his slightly freckled cheeks a bright pink as well.   
“Princess…” Bellamy whispered into Clarke’s ears as she held him closer, as if she could put some sort of shield around him, prevent him from going into that mountain… anything that could seal his fate, make sure he was okay. “I’ll be okay…” Bellamy reassured her as he felt warm tears spread onto his jacket.   
“I know…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey thanks for reading, and please leave a kudos and a comment! Update soon!


	9. The Princess, The Prince, and The Commander

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellamy has been caged in Mount Weather until a familiar face reappears, Tondc has been bombed, mortally injuring many, including Clarke, and Octavia begins to notice Lexa knew.

“Clarke? Have you seen-” Octavia walked into the tent with no warning, quickly waking up Bellamy, as Clarke continued to slumber, her golden hair laying next to Bellamy’s broad shoulders. “Bellamy?!” Octavia gawked, as Bellamy put a finger to his lips, warning Octavia to stay quiet.   
“Sh.” He mouthed as Octavia quickly ran from the tent, most likely crying in excitement and happiness for her best friend, but also probably a little grossed out.   
“Bel?” Clarke emerged, her hair somehow neat, golden glints sparkling in and out. Bellamy smiled at her, pushing his hair back. Clarke realized she was wearing Bellamy’s jacket around her shoulder, his aroma spreading around her like prison bars painted in riches.   
“I was trying not to wake you…” Bellamy smirked as he began to get up, Clarke pulling him back down.   
“Can’t we just stay here all day? We don’t have to worry about Grounders, or some treaty, or Mount Weather?” Clarke realized how selfish she sounded, as she let him go, like he electrocuted her or something.   
“You okay, princess?” Clarke nodded, as Bellamy turned towards her, gently kissing her perfect lips, a sensation crawling through both of their bodies like warm coffee.   
“Just promise me you’ll come back… please.” Clarke hugged him, his hair brushing against her face.   
“I promise.” Clarke squeezed her eyes shut, trying to get back to sleep… wishing this was all a bad nightmare her brain concocted to punish her more than usual.   
(ok, I know this is a huge time-skip but I want to keep this book focused on Bellarke, so we’re skipping to when Bellamy gets hung up, sorry if that pissed you guys off, also I know the timeline is super fucked, but it’s Bellarke, alright?) 

“You won’t get out…” Echo muttered, her exhausted head concealed in her bloody, bandaged arms. Bellamy couldn’t help it… he promised Clarke he’d come back. He wouldn’t let a few flimsy bars stop him from getting back to her.   
“I have to try. I need to.” Echo scoffed, her ears ringing from the dozens of screams emitting from cages.   
“We all need to get out of here.” Bellamy could see the deserted, forgotten hope in Echo’s amber eyes. “They’re killing us… one. By. One.” Bellamy could feel the pressing of the bars aching his tan skin.   
“No, you don’t understand. The Grounders and the one hundr- Arker’s made a treaty. We’re getting all of you out of here, but first, I need to get their acid down! I need to get out of here.”   
“The maun ste em?” Echo muttered to herself as a hissing sound emerged from the large metal door that seperated the cells from the rest of the facility. “Quiet.” Echo hissed as Bellamy ceased his banging, glancing at the three guards.   
They stopped at Echo’s cage, masking their faces like cowards. “This one.” The digital voice echoed across the scarily silent room, as Echo sighed, struggling to breath as fear coursed through her cold veins.   
Without thinking, Bellamy began to kick and punch the bars, marks indented on his wrists and feet. “Wait. Looks like we’ve got a live one.” The voice instructed as the other two electrocuted Bellamy with some sort of baton from outside his cage over and over.   
“Alright, hang him up.” The voice spat as the man left the room, with the other guard; leaving one of them to hang up and unconscious Bellamy. He woke up around ten minutes later, blood being sucked from his veins and something being stuck in him.   
A face stared back at him as he gasped for air, like he’d been trapped underwater… drowning with no prevail over any rescue. Tears stained his eyes as the Grounders began to bang against their cages, almost certainly causing attention to be directed towards the noise. “Who are you?” The high-pitched voice echoed through his brain, nearly overcoming Bellamy’s labored breathing.   
“You’re from the Ark, aren’t you?” She asked, as Bellamy began to put two and two together. Black hair, dark brown eyes… it was all there. Clarke had began to tell him about her torture at Mount Weather, how she’d almost died getting back.   
Clarke smiled, remembering how Jasper would obsess over his friend… she wasn’t from the Ark. She was from Mount Weather… what was her name. “Oh, now I remember. Her name was Maya,” Clarke smirked, picturing how ecstatic Jasper was.   
“She had short black hair, and dark brown eyes… kind of like yours. I guess she was the person who was draining me, since that was the first face I saw when I woke up. They had Monty… then he just disappeared.”   
Bellamy could tell Clarke was still traumatized from her experience there, and with Anya. “Anya was there… from the bridge.” Clarke and Bellamy were both surprised that her name wasn’t something more exotic, especially since she was a Grounder. 

Clarke face slowly began to plummet, as she looked towards the exterior of the gates. “I guess they didn’t recognize me… they thought we were Grounders.” Clarke’s eyes began to well up with tears. “They shot both of us, Bel. The only difference was, I survived and she didn’t… I could’ve died.”   
Bellamy took Clarke in his arms, letting her cry for however long she needed to. Clarke was only eighteen, and had still gone through so much more shit than most of the adults on the Ark.   
“Maya…” Bellamy whispered, his face began to turn red… not because he liked her, but because the blood was beginning to flow towards his head. The girl shifted, nodding her head rapidly. “How ‘bout getting me down, Maya?”   
The girl came to, realizing he was still being drained. She slowly unlatched the chains that were holding him to the ceiling, and tore out the wires that drained the blood from his body.   
As she was unlatching his other foot, a man began to open the door; as she quickly hung him up again. “Maya.” The man frowned, checking to make sure he was really seeing her. “You’re not cleared for this section.”   
“I know.” Maya’s eyes squeezed shut, with no tears escaping, surprisingly. “I’m sorry. I just… wanted to see what was so special about him, but… he’s dead.” Maya’s voice shook.   
“Indeed he is.” The man remarked, as he began to unchain Bellamy. “You’re a brave girl coming in he-”  
“UGH!” The man groaned as Bellamy’s bare foot rippled across his face, quickly making the way to his neck, snapping it without thinking. He was about to shoot Maya.   
Maya stared at the body emptily, as if she’d just murdered a friend… she’d just murdered a friend. It reminded Bellamy of Clarke, after… that night. “T-thanks.” Maya’s voice echoed across the noisy room, which was made up of screams.   
Bellamy quickly dressed in the man’s uniform, and made his way to Echo’s cage, unlocking it. “There’s an army here, get everyone uncaged, and kill anyone who comes in. Got it?”   
Echo nodded, whispering a quiet ‘thank you’ as the Grounders grew even louder. “They need to be quiet, or someone else is going to come in.”   
Echo nodded, turning towards the Grounders. “Shof op taim yu wish kom live!” Echo screamed, quickly quieting the prisoners.   
“Okay, let’s go.” Maya pushed Bellamy back, stopping him.   
“Wait. Everyone knows everyone here.” Bellamy smiled, tipping his beige hat before exiting the room.   
The door hissed once again as he exited the room, Maya following close behind him. “Okay, we have a radio in the warehouse… I’m assuming you intentionally came here, right?” Bellamy nodded, as something bumped into his waist.   
“Hello, mister!” Bellamy was speechless… they hadn’t been planning on killing everyone in the Mountain, but now they couldn’t. “Are you on the ground team? My daddy’s training to go up there!” The child smiled.   
He reminded Bellamy of Octavia when she was a kid. Aching to get out, trapped underground, but happy. “I hope he makes it… it’s beautiful up there.” Bellamy smiled.   
As the child returned to his class, Bellamy’s face dropped. Lovejoy. The guard that was now dead, his warm body beneath the floorboards, his nametag hidden deep below in Bellamy’s pocket. “There’s kids…”   
“What’d you expect to find here?” Maya frowned, before continuing to lead Bellamy to the ware-house. “Okay, it’s over here.” Maya carefully lifted the painting, revealing the seemingly endless pit of wires and electronics. “Here.” 

“This is Bellamy Blake, calling Ark Station. Is anyone there?” Radio silence emitted over the static. “Repeat, this is Bellamy Blake, calling Ark Station. Anyone there?”   
As Maya and Bellamy exchanged anxious glances, Clarke’s chipper voice rang over the radio, but still quiet enough to not disrupt anything. “Bellamy? Bellamy, is that you?” Bellamy could barely recognize Clarke’s voice over the old, crappy radio, but he knew it was her.   
“Clarke? It’s me. Is everything alright there… and with Lexa?” On the other side, Raven eyed Clarke, confused why Clarke was being interrogated about Lexa.   
“Everything’s fine here, Bellamy. How are you doing over there? Did you find the Grounders and our friends?” Maya nodded, politely taking the radio from Bellamy, who looked like he’d just been fed a three course meal, and was much less pale since when he arrived. 

“Clarke, it’s Maya. Everyone’s still alive, but not for long. They began human trials… your friends don’t have a lot of time.” Bellamy’s jaw clenched, as he glanced towards the radio, remembering the children.   
“Alright. Bellamy, the Grounders are outside the wall, and tell Maya not to worry, we don’t plan on hurting anyone. We just want our people back…” Maya nodded, as Clarke pushed her hair back, tears welling in her eyes. “Alright, that’s it. Urm, Maya could you give us a moment alone?”   
“Alright.” Maya quickly left the warehouse, Bellamy watched her go with a hopeful face, as he heard Clarke plead Raven to give them a moment on the other side. Bellamy knew Clarke wasn’t doing so well right now, he could hear her nearly silent sobs echoing through the static.   
“Clarke?” Bellamy softly asked, as she sniffled, realizing he was still there; listening.   
“Yes?” Clarke wiped the salty tears moisturizing her face. It was the closest thing to a wash she’d given herself since Bellamy left, and since Tondc. (sorry, i know the timeline is confusing, but it’s bellarke aight, also Lexa was the only one who knew, Clarke didn’t for the sake of the fanfic, sorry if this triggered you) 

“I’m okay.” Bellamy replied, wishing he was able to embrace her, kiss her, do anything he could do to make her feel good. “I promised I’d make it back to you. You know I never break my promises.”   
“You don’t understand, Bellamy… I did something horrible…” Bellamy squinted his eyes, not knowing what she was talking about. “They bombed us… they destroyed Tondc.” Bellamy felt his blood run cold, his eyes bulging out of his head. Octavia was at Tondc.   
“I pushed her out of the way, but I got hit…” Bellamy felt his hands shaking. Clarke did sound unwell, and was no doubt coughing blood with each loud shake of the radio. “I can’t walk, Bellamy… the worst part was… Lexa knew… they knew that they were going to bomb us, and she told me… she told me and I did nothing!” 

Bellamy could feel his blood freezing like soggy, cold cereal, as Clarke quietly wept. “You’re not a monster, Clarke. You saved lives… you saved Octavia. You did do something about it, and you nearly sacrificed your life for your people. You are not a bad person, much less a monster. Lexa may be heartless, but you aren’t.” Clarke cried a small bit louder, her leg wrapped in a metal brace, now matching Raven’s. Wick had made one for each of them.   
“But I am.” Suddenly, another voice rang over the radio, barking orders at Clarke. Lexa had been much harsher since Clarke rejected her, and they both refused to talk about. “Ge up, skai gada! osir don skrish kom do. Nau ge up fou ai slice your head gon.”   
Clarke whipped her head around, seeing Lexa staring at her with venomous eyes. Lexa knew she was talking to Bellamy, and knew she had an injured leg, but was still pushing her as hard as the soldiers. “I can’t. My leg, Lexa.”   
“I don’t care. Do you think your people will be able to wait for an injured leg? Do you want them to die, Clarke?” Lexa snided as she walked out, leaving an impression behind.   
“I have to go, Bellamy.” Bellamy tried to say something, wishing he could pull her out of the radio and kiss her, do something.   
“Wait, Clarke. Don’t push it, okay? And, don’t let her boss you around, you’re stronger than you think you are. I’ll see you soon, princess.” Bellamy smirked as she smiled from the other side.   
“Copy that.” She replied as the radio went silent, leaving Bellamy in a state of fear. How bad was Clarke’s injury? Would Lexa do something worse than boss her around? He needed to get back to his princess.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please leave a kudos and a comment!


	10. I Bare It So They Don't Have To

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Bellamy save the forty eight, but at what cost? Physically and mentally...

“Are you trying to get yourself killed?!” Bellamy seethed, subtly passing Jasper a gun… Jasper had a certain look on his face, which was frequent when he was confused, or scared, pretty much anything except happy. “They’re killing them, next time they come, you need to protect them better. Aim for the head.”   
Jasper was stunned, Bellamy was talking about killing someone like he would going to fetch berries, or check if Clarke had slept for more than three hours. That one was more frequent than the former. “Alright, just… help us soon, please… we won’t be able to stop them for long if we do end up winning.”   
“Don’t worry, Jasper… the Grounders are on there way.” Bellamy exited the room with the rest of the guard, not uttering a word to the forty eight teenagers who clearly knew it was Bellamy. Thankfully, none of them were stupid enough to call his name, or mutter to each other.   
“Wait, the Grounders?!” Jasper whispered to himself as his fingers laced around the metal gun, as if holding it granted some form of protection, despite the horrifying odds that always seemed to be tilted against them.   
________________________

“Clarke, I got the acid down, and the Grounders are ready to fight, but we’ve got to hurry this up because they’re starting to catch on.”   
“Alright, we’re already here. We’re standing outside, if you can’t hear the the Grounders chanting already. We’re getting the electricity off now, we’ll be in a couple of minutes, just make sure you can get everyone who’s… still alive.” Clarke paused, a strain of pain filtering through her voice. “I’m going to sneak in and help our friends get out, alright? I need to make sure they all get out.”   
Bellamy squinted his eyes, racking his brain for the plan… that wasn’t part of the plan. “Wait, Clarke… that’s not part of the plan. You need to stay safe outside, I don’t want to have to worry about you more than I already am, princess.”   
“You don’t need to, I can take care of myself. Plus, you’ll get to see me sooner, right?” Clare smiled, before spinning around to see Lexa approaching her. “Shit, I have to go, just make sure they’re all ready to get out when I get there, okay?”   
“Okay, princess.” Bellamy whispered as Clarke’s side went silent. Lexa nodded her head towards Clarke, who didn’t look happy to see her.   
“Who were you talking to, Clarke? We can’t have any distractions if you wish to free our people.”   
“That’s exactly what I’m doing, Lexa.” Suddenly, the light to the door turned off. “Why’s it so early? Fuck!” Clarke rushed to the door, aiding the Grounders who’d also been caught off guard.   
“Keep pulling!” Lexa spat as the Grounders prepared for a blood-bath, as the door opened wide, welcoming the warriors into Mount Weather. “Teik's hodnes!” Lexa screamed as Clarke slipped through the dark entrance, not realizing the Grounders slowly emerging from the door, she thought they were Mount Weather, and hid in the shadows as she charged towards the vent system, somehow going unnoticed.   
Clarke pulled the radio (which she’d hidden in her jacket) and started to talk to Bellamy. “Bellamy, I’m in, I’m going to Level Five, meet me there.” Bellamy hesitated to answer, as he heard something crawling through the vents above him.   
“Wait, they’re all on Level Five, princess! You can’t!” Clarke gritted her teeth, as she felt a grate under her, and realized that she was falling down, and had no time to react. “Clarke?” Bellamy muttered into the radio, his heart racing.   
“Clarke?” She’d had enough bad luck to land in the exact room where her friends were being drained of their blood, as two masked men looked down at her.   
“Clarke, perfect time to drop in. I suppose your savage friends have already left by now.” Clarke’s eyes turned to slits as a light traveled through her head. Those people weren’t Mount Weather… they were Grounders… Lexa traded our people for hers. Clarke wanted to kill Lexa as the masked men chained her up beside Monty and Harper, who looked like she was knocking on death’s door.   
“Clarke, what are you doing here? Where’s Bellamy?!” Monty uttered in Clarke’s ear so quietly even she barely heard him. She shook her head, warning for him to shut up as her eyes landed on the girl strapped on the metal table, a shiny layer of sweat and blood glazed over her.   
“What are you doing? Let her go!” The masked man chuckled as he continued to drill into the girl’s leg, screams ringing through the other teenagers’ ears. “I said, let her go!” Clarke seethed as she gathered enough momentum to lift herself up and kick one of the men in the leg, bending it the… wrong way.   
“YOU BITCH!” The man swore as his breath shuddered, his screams of pain music to the other kids’ ears. The second man held the first one from snapping Clarke’s neck right there and then, who looked like she’d just found a stash of food that would feed the entire camp for years.   
“She’s right, this one’ll die in a couple of minutes... “ Suddenly, the guard’s expression shifted. “If she wants this one down so badly, string her up instead.” The guard snided as they tore Clarke from her chains, and replaced them with leather straps around her wrists.   
Clarke laid expressionless as they tore a hole in her jeans, the drill whirling through her flesh. Screams ached to escape her lips as tears began to well through her eyes, but as her eyes raced for an escape, the same expression rang through her brain, inspiring her to live as long as possible. The longer she lasted, the less pain the others had to go through.   
“I bare it so they don’t have to, I bare it so they don’t have to.” Clarke thought to herself as her eyes widened, seeing a familiar face stare down at hers through the deafening drilling.   
Clarke winced as the drill hit something most likely vital in her body, tears swam down her face as Bellamy peered down at her, his face turning red with anger. Clarke gently shook her head, warning him not to jump down and get himself killed, but she knew Bellamy almost never listened to her.   
‘Please’, Clarke mouthed as Bellamy’s face lit up, as it disappeared; the silent noise of him sprinting down the vents, to the control room, which coincidentally was right next to this prison-like room.   
Monty, Jasper, Raven, Wick, Harper and the rest of the remaining forty-eight watched in horror, before a deafening alarm rang through their ears. “What the-”   
The as Cage’s face turned red with blotches, his mouth gasping for air as he collapsed onto the cold, damp floor. “What the hell?” Jasper’s eyes bulged as he quickly slipped out of his restraints, running for the dining hall, throwing Monty the keys as he sprinted towards the other room, passing Bellamy on his way out.  
“Bellamy?” Harper gawked as Monty unchained her, supporting her on his arm. Bellamy nodded, helping the rest of the forty eight out of the Mountain, remembering to come back for Clarke.   
“Get everyone out of here, Monty. All right?” Bellamy’s hoarse voice echoed as Monty nodded, helping the rest of the teenagers through the dining hall, where Jasper kneeled next to a red Maya, who looked like all of the life had been sucked out of her life, her eyes shifted closed.   
“J-Jasper…” Harper stuttered as Jasper spun around, his pupils barely visible through the salty tears that tore through his body.   
“GO! JUST LEAVE!” He screamed as Octavia helped Monty with Harper, deciding it was best that Jasper was alone for the second. “Maya…” Jasper collapsed onto Maya’s body, his sobs shaking his chest, the only movement in the haunted Mountain.   
Clarke moaned in excruciating pain as Bellamy tore the leather chains off of her. She was covered in sweat and blood, as was the table she’d been restrained to. “Bellamy…” Clarke collapsed into his arms, as he nodded, nearly squeezing her in his arms.   
“It’s okay, Clarke… you’re safe, they’re all safe. Let’s just get home, okay?” They cried together for a minute, until Bellamy finally picked her up, bridal style, and carried her through the rooms, which were now vacant.   
Even Jasper had gone. “Let’s go home…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, thanks for reading! I'm not sure if I'll do more chapters, tell me if you'd like me to in the comments, if you really want another chapter!


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